“Hey, Can you ____?”
“Oh, no, I can’t.”
“Who said you can’t? Have you tried before?”
“No, I haven’t tried. But I just know I can’t. I wish I could explain it to you.”
I’m sure you’ve been in such a conversation before. Ever wondered why there’s no explanation to justify that they can’t? It is only because, there is none.
What Are Limiting Self Beliefs?
We all have conceptions about ourselves. Everybody, at some point or the other, limits himself. The root cause of re-establishing limiting self-beliefs is a major lack of confidence. I believe, while an excess of confidence can be vulgar, a lack of it is equally vulgar. While some self beliefs can be based on an ounce of truth (such as, I’m shorter than average or I’m petite), they are given the quality of being a ‘problem’ by ourselves (I’m so petite I can never become a commanding personality in the entertainment industry.)
These are the limits. And we set them for ourselves. These thoughts begin to bubble in our minds as a response to our experiences or our own judgmental nature. I also believe stereotypes existing in society contribute to it significantly. Limiting self beliefs are a psychological barrier between us and our success!
‘To Know You Can’t, You Have To First Try’
People carrying limiting self beliefs usually harbor them within from a long time. Some may carry these since childhood, some from after.
Statements like “I’m so short, I could never be a model.” “I’m not intelligent enough to pursue a PhD.” “I’m not popular, I cannot be a politician and serve my society.” “I’m not articulate; I can never be a life coach or trainer.” “I’m not a good leader, I should just blend in with my team members.” “I can never ask her out, she’s out of my league.” It truly irks me to hear these statements. The amount of conviction with which they are said leaves me speechless!
I feel that if they could just put in the same amount of conviction into doing what they claim they can’t, they would accomplish it with ease.
When things do not happen, we will clearly dismiss it and name it bad luck or blame the various environmental factors. But the real problem remains- It did not happen, because you did not try!
It is important to make an attempt to overcome this inhibition as living with it life-long can stop you from becoming the happy, successful person you had the potential to be.
How To Uproot Limiting Self Beliefs
Sometimes your thoughts can be the biggest boulder separating you from success. You must become conscious about these thoughts and choose NOT to believe them. If you aspire to become a leader or want to become an entrepreneur, these limiting self beliefs can stunt your growth and suffocate you. They can hamper your personality, the way you interact with your environment. They can make you unsure about what you wanted in the first place. It can be detrimental to aspiring entrepreneurs.
Uprooting limiting self beliefs- it is a process which you should invest time into. It requires constant effort and may not be easy initially. The solution that worked for me was- train your thoughts.
Simply by choosing not to think about your imagined ‘deficiencies’, you can be free from limiting self beliefs. We have to reverse ill perceptions if we want to growth personally. These impact how we react to experiences in our lives- personal and professional. In our minds, there are only a finite number of things we are ‘good at’. The number increases four-fold when we think of things we’re ‘not good at’. Train yourself not to make these wrong assumptions. Understand who you really are by putting yourself to test in real experiences instead of assuming! Your self confidence will increase immediately while you pit yourself against a challenge.
Write Your Destiny
These inhibitions are real. They can affect us as individuals and can stop us from fulfilling our potential. By believing in your ‘inability’, you are actually deciding your destiny. Choose to write your story differently- it will be rewarding. Shrug away your limiting self beliefs!